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Showing posts from April, 2011

POINTED REPLIES WHEN YOU COULD HAVE HEARD A PIN DROP

Take 1: Field Marshal Sam Bahadur Maneckshaw once started addressing a public meeting at Ahmedabad in English. The crowd started chanting, "Speak in Gujarati. We will hear you only if you speak in Gujarati." Field Marshal Sam Bahadur Maneckshaw stopped. Swept the audience with a hard stare and replied, "Friends, I have fought many a battle in my long career. I have learned Punjabi from men of the Sikh Regiment; Marathi from the Maratha Regiment; Tamil from the men of the Madras Sappers; Bengali from the men of the Bengal Sappers, Hindi from the Bihar Regiment; and even Nepali from the Gurkha Regiment. Unfortunately there was no soldier from Gujarat from whom I could have learned Gujarati." ........ You could have heard a pin drop Take 2: JFK'S Secretary of State, Dean Rusk, was in France in the early 60's when Charles DeGaule, the French President, decided to pull out of NATO. DeGaule said he wanted all US military out of France as soon as possible. Rusk res

Finger Bowl !

Finger Bowl !   A wonderful story comes from 19th century England . According to the account, Queen Victoria was once at a diplomatic reception in London . The guest of honor was an African chieftain. All went well during the meal until, at the end, finger bowl were served. The guest of honor had never seen a British finger bowl, and no one had thought to brief him beforehand about its purpose. So he took the bowl in his two hands, lifted it to his mouth, and drank its contents down!   For an instant there was breathless silence among the British privilege guests, and then they began to whisper to one another. All that stopped; however, when Queen Victoria silently took her finger bowl in her two hands, lifted it, and drank its contents! A moment later, 500 surprised British ladies and gentlemen simultaneously drank the contents of their own finger bowls.   It was the queen’s uncommon courtesy that guarded her guest from certain embarrassment.   This is a

GIRLS NEW VERSION‏

  BOY: I LOVE YOU. YOU are THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL OF THIS WORLD. GIRL: NICE, PAR TUMHARE PICHE MUJHSE BHI JYADA KHUBSURAT LADKI KHADI HAI J     BOY MUD KAR PICHE DEHTA HAI, PAR WAAHN KOI NAHI THA. GIRL: AGAR TUM SACH ME MUHJSE PYAR KARTE TO KABHI PICHE NA DEKHTE.. I HATE YOU… LL     MORAL: MORAL, WORAL KUCH NAHI BUS LADKI ZARA TEZ NIKLI. KAHANI ABHI KHATM NAHI HUI. PICTURE ABHI BAAKI HAI MERE DOST… READ BELOW   . . . . . . . . . . . .                   BOY: CHALO JAISI TUMHARI MARZI, PAR AB MEIN YE DIAMOND RING KISKO DUNGA?... LL GIRL: LO, AB MEIN APNE JANU SE MAJAAK BHI NAHI KAR SAKTI......   MORAL OF THE STORY: GIRLS ARE GIRLS J J

new abc.......

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IT consultant

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie, gets out and asks the Shepherd: If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?" The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies: "Okay." The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the Ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer.   He turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1,586 sheep here." The shepherd cheers,"that's correct, you can have your sheep.   The young man makes his pick and puts