Ridiculous Quiz

By BR -

Ridiculous Quiz

1-   What driver doesn't have a license?       
Answer: A screwdriver. 
2-   Why do statues and paintings of George Washington always show him standing?       
Answer: Because he would never lie.    
3-   What has a neck, but no head?     
Answer: A Bottle.      
4-   What has one foot on each side and one in the middle?     
Answer: A Yardstick.   
5-   What did the guitar say to the rock star? 
Answer: Quit Picking on me.    
6-   What do you call a cat that likes to dig in the beach?    
Answer: Sandy Claws.   
7-   What kind of can never need a can opener? 
Answer: A Pelican.     
8-   Here on earth it is true, yesterday is always before today; but there is a place where yesterday always follows today. Where?     
Answer: In a dictionary.       
9-   How do you avoid falling hair?    
Answer: Step out of the way.   
10-   Why did the doctor switch jobs?  
Answer: He lost his patients!  
11-   What has 10 legs and drools?     
Answer: Quintuplets.   
12-   Where do old bowling balls end up?       
Answer: In the gutter. 
13-   What did one scale say to the other scale?       
Answer: You have a way about you!      
14-   Did you ever see the salad dressing?     
Answer: No, but I saw the bacon strip! 
15-   What did the mayonnaise say to the mustard?      
Answer: Close the door, I am dressing! 
16-   Why did the clock get sick?      
Answer: It was run down.       
17-   Why did the tree see the dentist?
Answer: To get a root canal.   
18-   How do prevent a summer cold?    
Answer: Catch it in the winter.
19-   What do mechanics charge to fix tires?   
Answer: A flat rate.   
20-   Why did you get rid of your watchdog?    
Answer: He could not tell time.
21-   Why did Johnny toss a glass of water out the window?     
Answer: He wanted to see a water fall. 
22-   What paper makes you itch?       
Answer: Scratch paper. 
23-   What never gets any wetter no matter how hard it rains?  
Answer: The Ocean.     
24-   What person is always in a hurry?
Answer: One who is Russian.    
25-   What did one wall say to the other?      
Answer: Meet you at the corner.
26-   Who always goes to bed with shoes on?    
Answer: A horse.       
27-   What is the first thing you do every morning?    
Answer: Wake up.       
28-   If a child is spanked by his mother and by his father, who hurts the most?       
Answer: Probably the child.    
29-   What do people make that nobody can ever see?    
Answer: Noise. 
30-   What kind of table has no legs?  
Answer: Multiplication table.  

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