Andhra Maverick

A computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty. Following is the conversation:   Tech: What's the problem? User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.   Tech: You'll need a new power supply.   User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.   Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.   User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.   10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech gets absolutely frustrated and fed up.   Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.   User: I knew it!   Tech: Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the CONFIG.SYS. Let me know how it goes. 10 minutes later.   User: It didn...

  My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.   Henny Youngman   -------------------------------------------------    My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then   we met.   Rodney Dangerfield   -------------------------------------------------   A good wife always forgives her husband when      she's wrong.     Milton Berle   -------------------------------------------------   I was married by a judge. I should have asked for   a jury.   George Burns   -------------------------------------------------    I bought my wife a new car. She called and said,    "There was water in the carburetor." I said,    "Where's the car?"    She said, "In the lake."    Henny Youngman   -------------------------------------------------  ...

Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in." (Courtney Cox Monica in "Friends")   "I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves." (Jerry Garcia)- (Grateful Dead)   Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house.(Rod Stewart)   "On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars." (Bruce Willis)-(On the difference between men and women)   "And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan." George Burns)   "Luge strategy? Lie flat and try not to die." (Carmen Boyle)-(Olympic Luge Gold Medal winner1996)   "There are only two r...

In a shop a man asked for 1/2 kg of butter. The salesperson, a young boy,said that only 1kg packs were available in the shop, but the man insisted on buying only 1/2 kg. So the boy went inside to the manager's room and said "An idiot outside wants to buy only 1/2 kg of butter". To his surprise, the customer was standing behind him. So the boy added immediately,  "And this gentleman wants to buy the other half!!!!!!". After the customer left, the manager said "You have saved your position by being clever enough at the right time. Where do you come from?". To this the boy said, "I come from Mexico . The place consists of only prostitutes and football players!!!!!". The manager replied coldly, "My wife is also from Mexico ". To this the boy asked excitedly, "Oh yeah? Which team does she play for?" Believe in your presence of mind and never panic!!!!!!!!

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? BARACK OBAMA:   The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE!   The chicken wanted CHANGE! JOHN MC CAIN:  My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON:   When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road.  This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road.  But then, this really isn't about me....... DR. PHIL:   The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before addi...

Satellites and the earth....!!!   From time of start of the Satellite on October, 4th 1957 till January, 2008 of 4600 stars have deduced in space about 6000 satellites from which approximately 400 fly outside of a geostationary orbit or on interplanetary trajectories.   Here so now the Earth looks from space. Photo European Space Operations Center.  

GOOD MORNING Dear Friends, Did you ever drink from a plastic bottle and see a triangle symbol on the bottom with a number inside? (Embedded image moved to file: pic03557.jpg)(Embedded image moved to file: pic28476.jpg)(Embedded image moved to file: pic27892.jpg) Do you know what the number stands for? Did you guess that it's just for recycling? Then you are WRONG!!!!!! THE NUMBER TELLS YOU THE CHEMICAL MAKE UP OF THE PLASTIC ..... 1 Polyethylene terephalate (PET) 2 High density polyethylene (HDPE) 3 Unplasticised polyvinyl chloride (UPVC) or Plasticised polyvinyl chloride (PPVC) 4 Low density polyethylene LDPE 5 Polypropylene (PP) 6 Polystyrene (PS) or Expandable polystyrene (EPS) 7 Other, including nylon and acrylic What you aren't told is that many of the plastics used are toxic and the chemicals used to create a plastic can leach out of the plastic and into the food / drink. Think about it, how many times have you or a friend said "I don't like...